One time long ago someone said to me “how long are you going to grieve”? This mind you was about 3 days after my father’s death. Which by the way was only a bit more than a year after my mothers. Something about that question reallllllly set me off. I got so upset that I started screaming at him as loud as I possible could. I felt utterly ignored for my feelings and for my need to be with myself to process what had just happened in my life. Not to mention that 2 years of being a caretaker was over and I could start focusing on myself again.
And that is then what I started doing. Needless to say that boyfriend did not get to share my new path. My new way of being with me which then also become my new way of being in the world and which has lead me here today.
My journey has been one of coming into my own and healing my emotional self. As I move through it I uncover more. Strange how I can keep realizing old emotions that are still keeping me in a thinking and therefore behavior pattern. The journey is not one of getting rid of them as that boyfriend wanted me to do. When he said get over it he basically said ignore it. When I was much younger I had to ignore many things that I felt because I did not know how to cope with it. Today I can let my heart speak and my emotions be felt and heard. Especially by me. The more we can be aware of how we feel, be honest in our acceptance of how we feel, the more we can heal. So let this be your inspiration to dare feel your feelings. Allow your emotions to speak their truth. Be in your heart so you can love yourself for it. And with that you will get through it all even if it is never over.
-with compassion and love
jeanette